Tuesday, April 9, 2013

I Love My Perfect Life

Something has been increasingly bothering me lately, and it's not my perfect life.

I love the blog Soulemama. I don't read it every day, but I like checking in with her from time to time. I also love her this moment posts, which is why I started doing my own my moment posts. The blogger, Amanda Soule, has a life completely other than my own. She lives in rustic Maine, has small farm animals, cans, knits, unschools, and is pretty much an all around ultra crunchy mama.

I came across a blog post a while back titled I am Not a Fan of Soulemama.com. The author writes about how it bothers her, as a crunchy mom herself, that Amanda Soule seemingly portrays natural parenting as easy and peaceful all the time. She points out that the Soulemama blog has pictures of children playing carefree outside without showing them bickering with each other or disobeying their parents, or how Amanda blogs about knitting for hours on end without sharing how she had to get up to tend to children several times within that time frame.

Meadowblue blogger (I cannot find her name) expresses how expensive and taxing and sacrificial natural living often is, and she is right, but if you can't celebrate someone portraying how fulfilling it also is, what's the point? If you already know how hard that lifestyle is, why do you need someone else to blog about it? And what does it benefit anyone to constantly have to balance the beauty of natural living with the hardship that can accompany it? I mean, do I have to tell you something negative along with every positive thing I write?

Now, hold that thought.

Recently, I've noticed several friends posting facebook statuses complaining about people that "constantly post updates and pictures of how perfect their life is all the time." THEN the icing on the cake was someone posting an article from Relevant Magazine titled Stop Instagramming Your Perfect Life. The author writes how disconcerting it can be to read blogs about fun activities to do with your kids, or see happy pictures on friends' instagram accounts, when you feel insecure about your own family or personal life. She shares that the internet and social networking sites should be community building and life giving and I agree.

But, is it a bad thing that life sometimes looks better in pictures? Should I feel guilty for capturing the one moment of the entire week that all four of my kids were smiling and wanting to share it with others? Does me posting fun family activities mean my life is like that all the time, or even that I'm attempting to portray that it is? Why would someone even assume that?

I don't know anyone who wants to read a blog about how hard life is. I don't. It seems to me the people who are so bothered by others' positivity are the ones "constantly" posting about how awful their life is! Apparently complaining about another person's happiness is the latest trend in negativity.

I guess I approach everything I see and read with the understanding that it is only a part of the picture. Even supermodels have to stink up a bathroom from time to time and every one of them is airbrushed in magazines. I do appreciate bloggers like Ashley Campbell, who writes Under the Sycamore, who includes struggles, and pictures with piles of laundry or dirty dishes in the background. It is nice to have proof of the imperfection in others' lives, but I don't need them to tell me to know it's there.

I mean it when I say life is what you make of it. I also do think my life is perfect. When I say that, I don't mean to say it isn't without struggle or hardship. Often I think my life would read like the script of a Lifetime movie or an episode of the Dr. Phil show! If you want to hear about it, bring over a bottle (or two) of wine on a Saturday night and I'll fill you in. But for goodness sake, if there weren't difficulties I wouldn't appreciate times of ease as much. What is important is that I always have what I need, I often have things I want, and I am surrounded with love, community and endless opportunities to better myself and the lives of others around me. What more could I really ask for in life?

If there is anything I am trying to prove or portray on my blog or elsewhere it's that there is beauty and perfection in the midst of chaos and struggle. I work hard to view life this way and to stay positive and grateful, so I have no apologies for splashing social media with my happiness.

Life is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Balance is a choice. I don't need to point out another person's hardships to be justified for having my own struggles and I don't need to air my own dirty laundry to shelter others from the bliss I experience, whether it is rare or often. I am not responsible for another person's insecurities and I cannot worry about offending someone with my joy.

I genuinely hope that by sharing joy and positivity and love I can instill in others the drive to find their own happiness and create their own "honey" in life. Bees work tirelessly to create honey and I don't feel bad when I enjoy it! Maybe this is a challenge to me to do more to bring joy into the lives of others so they can splash their own perfect life all over social media!

"Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Life is what you make of it, lovies. Make honey, and don't apologize for it!

2 comments:

Lana Leigh said...

love it. the last couple of paragraphs are full of clarity and it's sweet to hear you write this. i couldn't agree more. it is not insincere or fake to broadcast the joyful moments in life and leave the rest as it should be...in the past (not holding on me and trying to create some negative hold over my future). don't wanna soap box here, but suffice it to say, i loved it and i agree. :) go make some more honey!

Missy Rose said...

Thank you sweet friend!

 

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