Wednesday, February 27, 2013

haiku wednesday

thanks to spotify
and my Black Keys station, I'm
productive today!

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Something's Changing

Maybe it's the fact that I turn 32 this year and I seem to be leaving the naivete and ego of my twenties behind me.

Or maybe it was the month of having four kids full time, with an insane schedule, and how it forced me to put aside many of my business projects and focus on being a full-time mom.

Maybe it was the day I decided to own my real size and buy a pair of jeans that actually fit me instead of believing my butt is still the same size it was in college (or high school for that matter). They're crazy comfortable by the way.

Maybe it's the Lavender and Bergamot essential oil I've fallen in love with.

It could be the cinnamon I've been putting in my coffee, along with the pure local honey I stir in every morning that makes me oh so happy.

Maybe it's the extra time we have as a family in the evening since none of the kids are enrolled in extracurricular activities right now.

It could be my renewed interest in homeschooling my kids.

Maybe it's my amazing husband who loves and supports me in everything I do, who comes home and wants to tell me about his day and hear about mine, who uniquely compliments me as a person and as a parent so perfectly. He is the best life partner I could ever have and I couldn't imagine going through the chaos of our life with any other soul on the planet.

Or maybe it's the yoga, my new most favorite exercise ever, and how it opens my soul, strengthens my body, and calms my mind.

Maybe it's the new contact prescription I just got that has alleviated my headaches and tiredness (because it's significantly more powerful than the last one) that is giving me a clearer perspective (even though I'm sure it's further evidence that I'm just getting older).

Maybe it's a combination of them all. I don't know what it is, but something is happening inside of me. You know that scene in How the Grinch Stole Christmas, where the Grinch's heart grows three sizes?

Okay, well, whatever I'm experiencing is not as seemingly painful as what Jim Carrey's version of The Grinch was, but I do sort of feel like my heart is growing. Believe me, I'm not saying my life is all roses and perfect Pinterest recipes. I have PLENTY of negativity, stress, mistakes and challenges. But I am starting to see all the things I can't control or change in a new way. They don't bother me so much because they're out of my hands. 

What I can control is how I act, respond, feel and how I love others. I can control the moments I choose patience over anger, or to ignore my phone during dinner and listen to my kids ramble on about their days. I can control my attitude and how I view what I have with thankfulness instead of ruminating on all the things I want. I can appreciate my health and all the things I CAN do with my body, instead of agonizing over the fact that my love handles are exploding over the tops of pants I outgrew about seven years ago. 

Whatever it is happening inside the deepest parts of me I don't want to ignore. Whatever is growing or awakening I want to embrace and encourage. 

Life is what I make of it, not what anyone else projects on me. In spite of expenses and hardship I may endure at the hand of another, or disappointment and heartache I may experience, I am still here. I am still breathing, moving and living. I will make honey instead of bitterness. I will choose happiness over resentment. And I will rest knowing everything really is going to be alright. 


Okay... maybe it is the yoga.

Friday, February 22, 2013

{my moment}

A moment captured from the week that captured my heart.
A Friday ritual inspired by Soulemama.

My littles' school hosted a literacy night last night where they had the opportunity to meet an author and get books signed. We arrived and the boys ran ahead to get seats. When I caught up to them and found a spot to sit, I realized Aidan had found a spot next to Grace, a sweet little girl I've been hearing about through conversations in the car since the beginning of school. You'll just have to catch yourself up so you can understand how precious this is. 

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your moment in your comment. 

Happy Weekend, Lovies!

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

haiku wednesday

a lesson i learned
long ago, comes to me
live with open hands

Monday, February 4, 2013

Mama Monday - Episiotomies

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: you have choices in childbirth. The first step in knowing your choices and making them known to your care provider is being educated. I am passionate about women knowing their choices in childbirth, which is why I write about them on my blog and why I have developed a detailed Birth Plan Manual for my clients to assist and empower them in the process. 

One of the most feared interventions in childbirth is the episiotomy, and it is one reason many women consider elective cesarean births. Who wouldn't want to avoid an aggressive and painful procedure performed on one of the most vulnerable and sensitive body parts? But what so many women don't know is that this procedure is completely avoidable, unlike many of the harsh consequences guaranteed to accompany a surgical birth.

What Is an Episiotomy?

Episiotomies are cuts made to the perineum (the small, sensitive area of tissue located between the wall of the vagina and the opening of the anus) by the obstetrician, family doctor or midwife during the second stage of labor. The purpose is to widen the vaginal opening to make room for the crowning baby. Especially in first time labors, the vaginal and perineal tissue is very tight since it has never been stretched to this extent. It can sometimes take a long time, possibly hours, for this tissue to stretch enough to make way for the baby to emerge into the world.

What You Need To Know:
Some practitioners consider this a routine intervention, performing episiotomies on all birthing women, whether they believe it is always necessary, or because it speeds up the birth process. Your caregiver may feel an episiotomy is necessary if the baby is already in the birth canal, crowning, and in distress of some kind. Your caregiver may perform an episiotomy to birth your baby quickly and save his life. However, many skilled and knowledgeable midwifes will tell you they have never seen a need for an episiotomy.

If you are already tearing, or beginning to tear toward your urethra and clitoris, instead of toward your perineum and anus, your caregiver may perform an episiotomy to prevent such a tear. Tearing in the direction of your urethra and clitoris is extremely painful to recover from, and can cause serious complications far into the future. 

Episiotomies are generally considered more painful to recover from and take longer to heal than a natural tear would. If you would prefer a small, natural tear to an episiotomy, it is important you make this clear to your caregiver. 

How to Avoid an Unnecessary Episiotomy:

Tears and episiotomies can both be prevented with prenatal exercises such as Kegel exercises and perineal massage. During birth, warm compresses and more perineal stretching performed by your caregiver can also help prevent episiotomies and lessen the possibility or severity of tears. Often, a simple change in pushing position for the second stage of labor can avoid what some practitioners may feel is a necessary episiotomy. 

One of the greatest choices you can make to avoid an episiotomy is avoiding epidural analgesia. Since pain relief in the form of an epidural partially and sometimes completely numbs everything from the waist down, many women have a very hard time feeling the Ferguson Reflex (urge to push), and have difficulty pushing effectively. If you are able to work with your body and feel how to push correctly, as well as have the wherewithal to assume advantageous positions, your caregiver will feel less inclination to "help you out" with that unhappy little snip!

In short, there is no good evidence to support routine episiotomy on every woman, regardless of medical indication. When constructing your birth plan, be sure to include your preferences regarding routine episiotomies.

At Honeybee Mama, I'm committed to getting you the tools and resources you need to make informed decisions about your birth. If you have questions about your options in childbirth, check out my childbirth training manual and The Birth Experience Childbirth Training, or schedule a consultation today!

More pregnancy info!


Friday, February 1, 2013

{my moment}

A moment captured from the week that captured my heart. 
A Friday ritual inspired by Soulemama.

I know I comment on it often, but I am still overwhelmingly blessed by the moments I catch when the kids are "blending" so well. It must be a constant fear of a divorced and remarried parent: the worry that "yours" and "mine" will hate each other and we'll never truly be a cohesive family. Don't even get me going on my fears of being an evil stepmom!

Corrinne and Aidan teamed up quite some time ago. They are the ones asking for sibling "sleepovers" in each other's rooms, asking for tape and supplies for their latest craft project, and organizing the neighborhood kids in some new invention of a game. A couple of weeks ago, they discovered a pile of boxes waiting for recycling and dismantled them to build a lemonade stand. I. Love. It. This week, they discovered the piles of unread newspapers on my driveway (yeah, I'm that house) and decided to make kites out of the bags. This is the pictured of them testing their kites. It only lasted a moment because they decided they didn't work very well. They weren't discouraged though, and nonchalantly tossed them into the trash and bebopped onto their next adventure!

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your moment in your comment. 

Happy Weekend, Lovies!

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